A letter to my Churchwardens

DEAR churchwardens,

First of all, a caveat. You might think that is about you. It isn’t. It is concerning the Universal Churchwarden/Steward/Elder/General Figure of Elected Authority within the church community. On the opposite hand, most of my experience of GFEAs is drawn from Churchwardens I Have Known; so it’s, possibly, a bit bit about you. You know who you might be.

Thank you

IN THE Church of England (and I assume in other denominations as well), your responsibilities as GFEA are many and onerous. I’m perpetually astounded that anyone takes on the role, so great are your obligations; and I stand in awe at your dedication of, and repair to, your local church and community.

You and I are continuously being told to delegate, share the burden, devolve leadership and form teams, groups, and dealing parties with the intention to divide up the work in order that it doesn’t kill us. And on a regular basis we glance round, bewildered, wondering where these persons are going to return from, and feeling, perhaps, that it’s our fault that nobody is jumping in to wash the brass, write the school applications, or sort out the accounts. So, thanks, from the underside of my heart, that you’ve gotten advanced to share the leadership of this precious community of souls with me. It will not be a small thing you do, and more recognition must be given to all of the work that you just undertake.

ONE of my favourite addresses from an archdeacon to the deanery’s churchwardens began with the words “Be kind to one another and get a college,” which roughly sums up most wisdom. But, just as she went on to expand on this, so will I.

Getting things out of the best way

PLEASE forgive me: I’m not the Angel Gabriel. I can’t be all things to all people. There can be some things that I’m excellent at, some I can nearly get by in doing, and others where I lack any skill in any respect. You probably must have discerned this on the interview, and I at all times attempt to be as honest as I can on those occasions in order that expectations might be managed. However, should you were led to imagine I used to be an overachieving all-rounder, who could triple your church congregation and quadruple your income, I apologise.

Bear in mind, nevertheless, that although distance in time and placement has lent a rosy glow to my predecessor, they weren’t the Angel Gabriel either. On the opposite hand, nor were they the Spawn of Satan. Like me, they were just odd humans, attempting to serve God and their people to one of the best of their ability, while still retaining some sense of proportion and sanity.

As you forgive me, so I forgive you for all of the exaggerations, downplaying of issues, and outright fibs contained in your parish profile. It takes years of experience to “read” a parish profile and — although some fun might be gained not telling me where the bodies are buried — it’s best to be honest from the beginning.

Your role(s)

EVERY 12 months, Church of England churchwardens are reminded of their duties on the Visitation, after they are sworn in for an additional period of service. I don’t have to remind you of the general public responsibilities and duties, but there are other, unspoken tasks which I’m grateful should you undertake.

Storykeepers

MORE often than not, you hold the story of the church community. You know why one person or family won’t speak to a different. You are aware of the particularity of pew seats and graves; you might be accustomed to local practices and ancient traditions. You hold the key of why you employ a specific hymn book/order of service/carpet color. Please don’t keep this data to yourself. In order to be effective, I want to know the backstory. I appreciate it might be biased and incomplete, but that’s OK. I’ll ask plenty of people the identical questions and eventually come to a rough understanding of the reply. But I won’t know anything should you don’t tell me, and that might be worse, as I run the danger of blundering in and causing unnecessary and completely unintentional distress. It’s not gossip: it’s storytelling.

Gatekeepers

PEOPLE will inform you things they won’t tell me. Sometimes they are going to not want these items passed on. Sometimes they can be really hoping that you’re going to let me know the way they feel. Your job is to discern what it’s best I do know, and in addition to interrupt it to me as gently as possible. Be honest, but in addition kind. Some things I actually don’t have to know. However, please don’t begin your conversation with “People are saying. . .” Very often which means “One person is saying”, and even “I feel this but am not willing to own it publicly.”

Sometimes, I’ll want to clarify in an off-the-cuff way why I even have modified things or made certain decisions. I’ll inform you these items so which you can drip feed them out into the community. I will even inform you about things that I’m pondering of doing so which you can test out the lie of the land — if they will cause huge disruptions then I probably won’t do them.

You could make change possible or inconceivable. You have a big impact on the atmosphere of the church. Your support — or lack of it — may determine how successful a project or initiative seems to be. Please pay attention to this power, and use it correctly and sensitively for the great of the community.

Negotiators

AS INDICATED above, I can’t be all things to all people, and I cannot do all the pieces that is needed — and even needed. Part of your role is to barter this with me, and with the congregation, explaining that I’m only one person with a limited skill set, and reminding me of the identical. To this end, don’t be afraid to place pressure on me to take days off, holidays, retreats etc. A shattered, worn-out priest is not any good to anyone — higher to have one who works steadily than one whose ministry is characterised by peaks of activity followed by complete collapse.

Study days are vital, too: the practice of ministry has modified since I used to be ordained, and it is important that I sustain with developments if we usually are not all to grow to be trapped within the late Nineties.

Three final pieces of recommendation

• Never be afraid to place out a traffic cone and reserve me a automobile parking space. It is a real kindness, and anyway I’ll get my cassock all muddy if I even have to park half a field away.

• Keep praying. Pray for me and with me, for the community, and for yourselves. We won’t get anywhere without God.

• Remember that the church is not going to collapse without us. Take a time off yourself to smell the flowers, and know that you’ve gotten the deep gratitude of this parish priest for all that you just do.

Sally
 

The Revd Dr Sally Welch is Vicar of the Kington Group within the diocese of Hereford.