THE headstone of a deceased woman may bear the 2 nicknames “Lucy” and “Cinders” — moderately than her given name, Lucinda — although this doesn’t comply with the necessities of the Churchyard Regulations, a Chancellor has ruled.
The Consistory Court of the diocese of Carlisle granted permission for the headstone to be installed, with the nicknames, within the graveyard of the Grade II listed St Cuthbert’s, Kentmere.
Andrew Yeats first applied informally to put in a headstone commemorating his late wife, Lucy Nelson, who was widely often called Cinders. He didn’t want any reference to her given name, Lucinda, which she had actively disliked.
That was contrary to the Churchyard Regulations, which, in paragraph 2.5.4 of Appendix B, state: “The Christian and surnames of the deceased needs to be given.” Mr Yeats also proposed a design with a big sunflower on the reverse of the headstone.
At least one member of the PCC of St Cuthbert’s had reservations concerning the design. A bare majority favoured Mr Yeats’s proposal. Other members raised concerns that the Diocesan Chancellor, the Worshipful James Fryer-Spedding, considered “not obviously unreasonable”.
After further engagement with the PCC, Mr Yeats presented a petition for a college for the installation of the headstone designed by a letter-carving specialist, Pip Hall. The PCC unanimously supported that design, and the diocesan advisory committee (DAC) commended the top quality of Ms Hall’s work, together with the proposed use of V-cut lettering in a stone produced from riven slate.
The DAC didn’t consider that the design would set an unwelcome precedent, and the tenor of its advice was that it was of a top quality.
In regard to using the name “Lucy” moderately than “Lucinda”, the Chancellor agreed with the DAC’s view that “Lucy” was suitable, appropriate, and commonly recognised as a well-recognized type of the name “Lucinda”.
Regarding using the name “Cinders”, the DAC’s view “was not one among outright objection (given its significance for the family) but of concern about its placement and presentation”. Mr Yeats’s suggestion was that the name (in inverted commas) be placed on the bottom of the reverse side of headstone, below the sunflower.
The DAC proposed that, in view of the “substantial open space available elsewhere on the stone, the name ‘Cinders’ appeared isolated and without clear context or reference, particularly because the name ‘Lucinda’ doesn’t appear within the fundamental inscription”. The DAC was also concerned that “its low placement could, over time, turn into obscured by grass or foliage, and thus be easily lost.”
The DAC, subsequently, favoured placing the name “Cinders” on the front of the stone beneath “Lucy Nelson”, leaving the reverse to concentrate on the carved flower motif.
Mr Yeats’s response, while expressing his gratitude for the DAC’s “well-considered and sympathetic comments”, was that he would nevertheless prefer to avoid putting the name “Cinders” on the front of the stone. That was partly because he wished to depart space for an inscription in his own memory sooner or later.
He also explained that to have “Cinders” under the sunflower on the reverse reflected his wife’s original design. He also reasoned that adding the name “Cinders” to the front might risk making the design unduly busy when it got here to Ms Hall’s hand-carved calligraphy. Furthermore, his wife was a terrific lover of nature and wild flowers and “would moderately like the concept of her name sometimes being partly obscured by the wild grass and flowers”.
The Chancellor said that he had needed to weigh the DAC’s “thoughtful advice” against Lucy Nelson’s “evident preparedness for a part of her design to be intermittently hidden by nature”.
“On balance”, he decided that Mr Yeats’s design needs to be permitted, even when that involved “allowing elements of non-public expression to prevail over strict practicality”.
In the actual circumstances of this case, the Chancellor granted a college allowing the gravestone within the design proposed by Mr Yeats in his wife’s memory.
