Military Spouse Appreciation Day is observed on May twelfth. Have you considered ways to support military spouses? This often subtle, under-the-radar outreach and ministry opportunity stands open to participation from fellow military community members or those of us nestled deep in civilian surroundings—young and young-at-heart as well.
Is it Hard Being a Military Spouse?
Life may be exciting and filled with recent experiences within the military community, but it may even be hard for the military spouse.
During my nearly twenty years as a Navy wife, I recall many situations by which outside support helped me conquer each day tasks and far larger needs. Assistance from others proved to be vital, but I often struggled to ask for help.
The excuses often ran something like this: I don’t need to inconvenience them. I should have the opportunity to do that myself. Or I simply didn’t know what to ask for or the best way to ask.
So I didn’t. (It’s not a path or plan I’d recommend, by the way in which.)
Being a whole lot of miles away from family, shuffling a schedule of uncertainty, safety concerns, and spousal absence resulting from month’s-long deployments or frequent weeks-long exercises all play a component within the lifetime of a military wife or husband. It’s as much as military spouses to maintain our family and house together and running fluidly while the energetic member is away. That’s sometimes a tricky order. As a result, life may be lonely, exhausting, and difficult for military spouses. But with somewhat help, joy often filters back in as rest, and deepening faith, too.
That’s where Christians, whether civilian or otherwise, have an exquisite opportunity to tug up alongside military spouses and support them through the hard days and seasons through prayer or practical means. And one of the best part? This outreach stays possible whether we’re in person or across the miles.
How to Support Military Spouses During Deployment
Photo credit: ©GettyImages/jacoblund
Matthew 7:12 (WEB) tells us this: “Therefore, whatever you desire for men to do to you, you shall also do to them; for that is the law and the prophets.”
The Golden Rule offers wisdom for each day life. Simply treat others the way in which we’d prefer to be treated—including supporting military spouses during deployment and at other times too. It’s a chance to assist others like we’d appreciate help, stepping in to support spouses battling overwhelm, exhaustion, fear, anxiety, and plenty of other emotions amid various situations.
How will we support military spouses during deployment? Simply be there. Below are ten ways to support them during deployments in addition to all year long.
10 Ways to Support Military Spouses
1. Cook a Meal
Healthy, home-cooked meals go a good distance. So does the inclusion of paper goods. I spent far too many late nights washing dishes after our young trio went to bed, exhausted but knowing I didn’t need to wake to a multitude. A house-cooked dish and paper utensils helped.
2. Offer to Babysit or Pay for a Babysitter
Pregnant with our second child, a sort, empty-nester from our church offered to look at our two-year-old son during my obstetrician appointments. (Kids weren’t allowed to accompany the parent, which is particularly tricky for those who’re recent on the town.) My son and this sweet woman bonded in a way that continues twenty-one years and plenty of relocations later. Meanwhile, I discovered relief knowing Joel was protected (and having a great deal of fun!) with someone I trusted.
My husband and I were especially particular concerning babysitters. As a result, we didn’t exit often. However, I discovered breaks from the youngsters obligatory during his absences for my mental health in addition to easy things like Christmas shopping without children in tow.
3. Housecleaning Help
Housekeeper expenses and military family budgets rarely mix, so this one’s a pleasant outreach to contemplate. Offer an hour each week during deployment to help with general cleansing. Show up with a lawn mower in the event that they live within the civilian community, and whack those grass blades. It’s much safer than a military spouse attempting to mow with their child perched on their lap. Hire a housekeeper to scrub once a month or quarterly during deployment. Offer to look at the youngsters or pay for a babysitter so the military spouse can clean without interruption. Or, even buy a book with cleansing and organizational suggestions in it.
4. Invite Them to Church or Small Group
It’s amazing how far a small invitation can go. When moving to a recent location, the whole lot seems foreign. Military families dig in to seek out mechanics, dentists, specific stores and resources they’ll need, and relationships—each with Jesus and other people.
Help them with the transition. Invite them to church. Open the door for a small group. Many of my family’s lifelong relationships stemmed from either church or church small groups. We remain in contact with these people, and the bond stays special years later.
5. Invite Them into Your Home
Get to know them, and permit the spouse and families to get to know you. Open the doors to your life and residential—with wisdom, after all.
At one in all our duty stations, a pair from church invited us to their home often. We chatted about Jesus and wrestled with faith things together. They introduced us to their world and allowed our children to grow to be a part of it. This tickled my husband and me because we were each “country kids.” This couple’s generosity helped expose our youngsters to the life-style my husband and I assumed was impossible due to our military lifestyle.
6. Invite Them to Dinner and Help Them Sample Local Cuisine
People bond over food. And being invited to a different’s dinner table? It’s special.
We sat at our country friends’ dinner table and enjoyed delicious Southern food more times than I can count. But in case your culinary skills teeter, never fear. Invite a military spouse to affix you at a neighborhood favorite. Or explore recent options together.
7. Check with Them
Call, text, or visit in person, but check in on military spouses. They won’t ask for it, typically, so intentionality helps. It might take some time before they trust you with their concerns or needs, but they’ll appreciate being considered and the generosity of this motion.
A pair once helped us decorate for Christmas. Our kids were young, and my husband was gone. That was a special afternoon that got here about because, through conversation, they checked in on me.
8. Exchange Phone Numbers
It’s easy enough so as to add folks to phone contact lists. Exchanging contact information indicates a primary step in relationship buy-in, and it gives that spouse a neighborhood connection to inquire about stores, repairs, etc.
9. Pray
The Bible, in 1 Thessalonians 5:17, prompts us to wish continually. The military spouse’s list of needs and concerns runs long, especially during deployment, exercises, or each time the energetic duty member is away. Encourage them to take the each day must their Creator and the lover of their soul in prayer frequently. For in Him, our needs are truly met.
Ask about and bathe their each day task list in prayer. Their needs, concerns, and struggles, too. Pray quietly alone or one-on-one with the military spouse. Include the family in a prayer walk or circle. Whatever the approach, take those each day must the feet of the One who stays faithful, and encourage the military spouse to do the identical.
10. Be There
With a husband deployed and our third child’s due date facing me, several friends rallied. Some watched our two older children until my parents arrived on the town. Another friend drove with me to the hospital. A couple of stayed with me as I labored unsuccessfully, and one even stayed the night on the hospital, then attended the birth within the operating room the next day. They showed up. And we will too. Whether in person, through letters, video, text, or a call, now we have an exquisite opportunity to be there for them.
Grab a number of ways to support military spouses, walk out the “golden rule,” and watch a possible lifelong relationship unfold. May the Lord be praised.
Check out Kristi’s recent book, 101 Prayers for Military Wives, which you possibly can pre-order here!
About the book: “Trust within the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your personal understanding; in all of your ways undergo him, and he’ll make your paths straight.” (Proverbs 3:5-6 NIV) Kristi Woods, a military wife herself for 19 years, offers heartfelt prayers to encourage the unsung heroes of the military. 101 Prayers for Military Wives is a set of topical prayers that brings hope and reminds military wives that whatever situation they find themselves in, God is near, He may be trusted, they usually are never alone.
Photo credit: ©GettyImages/jacoblund
