Have you ever caught yourself pondering that there is simply a right or incorrect way think, with no in-between? This is known as black and white pondering, and though it’s pretty common, it may make us feel frustrated and stuck. Life exists on a spectrum, which suggests that sometimes we’ve to embrace the grey areas in between all that black and white!
Another method to understand black and white pondering is as all or nothing pondering. Being human isn’t easy, so neither should the way in which we take into consideration and approach life. Many things have many causes, and in some cases, right or incorrect comes nose to nose with moral ambiguity. Some conflicts exist without good or bad sides, and a few problems haven’t any right answers.
This is why it’s so essential that we learn to embrace “grey” pondering to cope with the hard-to-solve challenges of the true world. We have to step away from extremes and absolutes and acknowledge that much of life exists within the realm of “sometimes, perhaps” fairly than “at all times, never”.
Indeed, if we’re unable to see alternatives in a situation or as a possible solution to an issue, we will find yourself negatively impacting our mental health and life. We may find yourself punishing ourselves if we don’t do something exactly “right” or if we fail to fulfill our own high standards, or we may find yourself overlooking how essential we’re to others. With black and white pondering, we will quickly grow to be hopeless or depressed, and feel like we’ve little to no value.
If you’re feeling like you regularly succumb to this manner of pondering, take a while to watch yourself and note down how you’re occupied with situations and the way you seek advice from yourself. See if there are any patterns you may observe in your personal life, what your triggers are, and the way you may work on changing your responses and way of pondering.
To do that, I like to recommend using the Neurocycle mind management method I even have developed and studied over the past three a long time, which I discuss intimately in my book Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess and my app Neurocycle.
The Neurocycle is a method to harness your pondering power that I even have developed and researched over the past three a long time. It has 5 steps. The first step is to 1. gather awareness of how you’re feeling mentally and physically and your perspective once you end up falling into patterns of black and white pondering. The second step is to 2. reflect on how you’re feeling and why. Then you 3. write down your reflections to assist organize your pondering. The fourth step is to 4. recheck: take into consideration what your thoughts and feelings are attempting to let you know. What does it say about what happened to you? What is your “antidote”— how will you’re employed through how your thoughts are affecting you? Look for clues in your writing, then begin to reframe/reconceptualize the way in which you’re occupied with what happened and the way you may improve the situation. Lastly, do your 5. energetic reach. This is a thought or motion you’ll want to practice every day to make it easier to reconceptualize what you considered within the previous step – that’s, what you’re going to do every day to offer yourself the time and mental space needed to cope with what’s bothering you and switch your black and white pondering right into a constructive future.
For more on managing black and white pondering, hearken to my podcast (episode #584). If you enjoy listening to my podcast, please consider leaving a 5-star review and subscribing. And keep sharing episodes with family and friends and on social media. (Don’t forget to tag me so I can see your posts!).
Originally published on drcarolineleaf.com. Used with permission.
Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/fizkes
