Many people today approach relationships with an informal mindset, saying things like, “We’re just having fun and going with the flow, nothing serious,” or, “Commitment and exclusivity are overrated. They create an excessive amount of pressure and feel restrictive. I’ve been on five dates with five different people just this week alone.”
This perspective has turn out to be common, even amongst Christians. Over time, secular influences have subtly shaped Christian perspectives on relationships, resulting in the normalisation of unbiblical dating practices, particularly casual dating.
God’s Design for Romantic Relationships
The Bible presents marriage because the only God-ordained romantic relationship between a person and a girl. It shouldn’t be just an optional final result however the intended purpose of a romantic relationship. From the start, God established this structure when He created Adam and Eve. Genesis 2:24 states, “That is why a person leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and so they turn out to be one flesh.”
This doesn’t mean that we should always rush into marriage the moment we develop feelings for somebody. So why is casual dating problematic? Isn’t dating vital to search out an acceptable spouse?
The Dangers of Casual Dating
The issue with casual dating is that it lacks clear intention. Instead of being a step towards finding the bone of 1’s bone or the flesh of 1’s flesh (Genesis 2:23), it is usually used as a method of entertainment, temporary pleasure, or filling a void of loneliness. It also normalises practices meant to be sacred inside marriage, equivalent to sexual intimacy, cohabitation, and even raising children.
However, there’s nothing casual about romantic relationships. The Bible often compares the bond between a husband and wife to the connection between Christ and His church (Ephesians 5:25-27 and 31-32). God’s love is steadfast and committed, serving as the last word example of how relationships must be approached.
The satisfaction, joy, and luxury often sought in casual romantic relationships are temporary and may only be everlastingly present in Christ. John 4:14 affirms this, “But whoever drinks the water I give them won’t ever thirst. Indeed, the water I give will turn out to be in them a spring of water welling as much as everlasting life.”
The Alternative: Biblical Courtship
So, what’s the choice? Biblical courtship. While it involves attending to know a possible spouse, it does so with a transparent concentrate on God and marriage.
In biblical courtship, each individuals place their decision in God’s hands through prayer (Proverbs 3:5-6). Their relationship with God is prioritised, recognising that finding the precise person shouldn’t be nearly searching but additionally about becoming the precise person (Matthew 6:33). From the start, each parties acknowledge a shared interest in pursuing marriage.
Unlike casual dating, biblical courtship is a slow and guarded process. It involves setting boundaries that honour God and one another, avoiding situations that result in temptation (Proverbs 4:23 and 1 Corinthians 6:18). It also emphasises spiritual growth by encouraging prayer, studying Scripture, and serving together. This helps prevent the chance of being unequally yoked, a priority addressed in 2 Corinthians 6:14.
Although biblical courtship allows for private selection, it also includes guidance from trusted mentors, pastors, and members of the family (Proverbs 11:14). Their counsel provides wisdom and accountability, helping to make sure that the connection stays centred on God’s will.
Embrace God’s Design for Relationships
Choosing biblical courtship over casual dating shouldn’t be about following rigid rules but about pursuing a relationship that aligns with God’s plan. A relationship that honours God’s design is not going to only bring true joy and fulfilment but will even function a testament of His love – a love that’s faithful, intentional, and everlasting.
