What have Church leaders taught about different kinds of affection?

Valentine’s Day is a time for celebrating love of every kind. In addition to teachings on romantic love, here’s a take a look at what Church leaders have said about various forms of love.

Love of God

“Brothers and sisters, the pure love of Christ is the reply to the contention that ails us today. Charity propels us ‘to bear each other’s burdens’ somewhat than heap burdens upon one another. The pure love of Christ allows us ‘to face as witnesses of God in any respect times and in all things’ — especially in tense situations.”

— President Russell M. Nelson, April 2023 general conference, “Peacemakers Needed”

“You are a beloved [child of God]. Nothing you do — or don’t do — can change that. God loves you because you might be His spirit [child]. Sometimes we may not feel His love, however it is at all times there. God’s love is ideal. Our ability to sense that love just isn’t.”

— Elder Dale G. Renlund, October 2022 general conference, “Your Divine Nature and Eternal Destiny”

“Brothers and sisters, do you already know how completely God, our Heavenly Father, loves you? Have you felt His love deep in your soul? …

“God’s love just isn’t present in the circumstances of our lives but in His presence in our lives. We know of His love after we receive strength beyond our own and when His Spirit brings peace, comfort and direction. At times it might be difficult to feel His love. We can pray to have our eyes opened to see His hand in our lives and to see His love in the great thing about His creations.”

— President Susan H. Porter, then the primary counselor within the Primary general presidency, October 2021 general conference, “God’s Love: The Most Joyous to the Soul”

“God loves us — at all times — and we love Him. Our love of God counters all fears, and His love abounds in holy places. Think about it. When we’re tentative in our commitments to the Lord, after we stray from His path resulting in life everlasting, after we query or doubt our significance in His divine design, after we allow fear to open the door to all its companions — discouragement, anger, frustration, disappointment — the Spirit leaves us, and we’re without the Lord. If you already know what that’s like, you already know it just isn’t a superb place to be. In contrast, after we stand in holy places, we will feel God’s love, and ‘perfect love casteth out all fear’ (Moroni 8:16).”

— Elder Ronald A. Rasband, October 2018 general conference, “Be Not Troubled”

“Your Heavenly Father loves you — each of you. That love never changes. It just isn’t influenced by your appearance, by your possessions, or by the amount of cash you’ve gotten in your checking account. It just isn’t modified by your talents and skills. It is just there. It is there for you if you find yourself sad or blissful, discouraged or hopeful. God’s love is there for you whether or not you are feeling you deserve love. It is just at all times there.”

— President Thomas S. Monson, October 2013 general conference, “We Never Walk Alone”

“Do we regularly reject the Lord’s love that He pours out upon us in rather more abundance than we’re willing to receive? Do we expect we’ve got to be perfect in an effort to deserve His love? When we allow ourselves to feel ‘encircled about eternally within the arms of his love’ (2 Nephi 1:15) we feel protected, and we realize that we don’t have to be immediately perfect. We must acknowledge that perfection is a process. This is a gospel of everlasting progress, and we must remember to understand the journey. ‘Eternal’ means ‘without starting or end,’ so the encircling of His love is there for us each day. Remember, it’s constant — even after we don’t recognize it. I really like Nephi’s description of this great gift: ‘The love of God … sheddeth itself abroad within the hearts of the kids of men; wherefore, it’s probably the most desirable above all things … and probably the most joyous to the soul’ (1 Nephi 11: 22-23).”

— Sister Bonnie D. Parkin, then the Relief Society general president, October 2006 general conference, “Eternally Encircled in His Love”

Love of family

“Every family has moments of awkwardness.

“Like when your parents ask you to take a ‘selfie’ of them, or when your great-aunt insists that you simply are still single because you might be just too picky, or when your opinionated brother-in-law thinks his political view is the gospel view, or when your dad arranges a family portrait with everyone dressed like characters in his favorite movie.

“And you get the Chewbacca costume.

“Families are like that.

“We may share the identical gene pool, but we usually are not the identical. We have unique spirits. We are influenced in alternative ways by our experiences. And each of us finally ends up different in consequence.

“Rather than attempting to force everyone right into a mold of our own making, we will decide to have a good time these differences and appreciate them for adding richness and constant surprises to our lives.”

— Then-President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, April 2016 general conference, “In Praise of Those Who Save”

“In today’s world, where Satan’s aggression against the family is so prevalent, parents must do all they will to fortify and defend their families. But … our most elementary institution of family desperately needs help and support from the clan and the general public institutions that surround us. Brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, grandparents and cousins could make a robust difference within the lives of youngsters. Remember that the expression of affection and encouragement from an prolonged member of the family will often provide the suitable influence and help a toddler at a critical time.”

— Then-Elder M. Russell Ballard, October 2005 general conference, “What Matters Most Is What Lasts Longest”

“The everlasting family is central to the gospel of our Savior. There can be no reason for Him to return to earth to rule and reign over His kingdom unless the everlasting family unit has been established for our Father in Heaven’s children. When we understand the everlasting role of the family, the nourishing and developing of strong family ties tackle even greater significance. …

“Learning to understand what it means to belong to an everlasting family is of great importance to us. Remember, you might be a part of that everlasting unit that requires your best effort. Be certain you bring warmth, kindness, understanding, consideration and a robust like to your everlasting family.”

— Elder L. Tom Perry, October 1998 general conference, “Youth of the Noble Birthright”

“Family members are priceless possessions. They offer love and strength. But much more, relations need one another. You can select to pay attention to the needs of every member of the family and do your part to assist fill those needs. Some need an individual to listen; some might have a compliment or positive reinforcement. There is strength and satisfaction in becoming involved in family projects. Encourage family love by being approachable even if you feel you’ve gotten reason to show away. The first step back in looking for family acceptance is to alter oneself for the higher. It is true today, true yesterday and can be true tomorrow that effective leadership can only be administered through love.”

— Elder Marvin J. Ashton, April 1988 general conference, “While They Are Waiting”

Love of spouse

“If you suppose that the full-blown rapture of young romantic love is the sum total of the chances which spring from the fountains of life, you’ve gotten not yet lived to see the devotion and the comfort of longtime married love. Married couples are tried by temptation, misunderstandings, financial problems, family crises, and illness, and all of the while love grows stronger. Mature love has a bliss not even imagined by newlyweds.”

— President Boyd K. Packer, April 2015 general conference, “The Plan of Happiness”

“It is just with the companionship of the Holy Ghost that we will hope to be equally yoked in a wedding free from discord. I even have seen how that companionship is crucial for felicity in a wedding. The miracle of becoming one requires the assistance of heaven, and it takes time.”

— President Henry B. Eyring, October 2013 general conference, “To My Grandchildren”

“It is so rewarding to be married. Marriage is wonderful. In time you start to think alike and have the identical ideas and impressions. You have times if you find yourself extremely blissful, times of testing, and times of trial, however the Lord guides you thru all of those growth experiences together.”

— Elder Richard G. Scott, April 2011 general conference, “The Eternal Blessings of Marriage”

“Harmony in marriage comes only when one esteems the welfare of his or her spouse amongst the best of priorities. When that actually happens, a celestial marriage becomes a reality, bringing great joy on this life and within the life to return.”

— Then-Elder Russell M. Nelson, October 2008 general conference, “Celestial Marriage”

“True love just isn’t a lot a matter of romance because it is a matter of anxious concern for the well being of 1’s companion.

“Companionship in marriage is susceptible to turn out to be commonplace and even dull. I do know of no more certain approach to keep it on a lofty and galvanizing plane than for a person occasionally to reflect upon the undeniable fact that the helpmeet who stands at his side is a daughter of God, engaged with Him in the good creative strategy of bringing to pass His everlasting purposes. I do know of no simpler way for a girl to maintain ever radiant the love for her husband than for her to search for and emphasize the godly qualities which might be an element of each son of our Father and that might be evoked when there may be respect and admiration and encouragement. The very processes of such actions will cultivate a always rewarding appreciation for each other.”

— Then-Elder Gordon B. Hinckley, April 1971 general conference, “‘Except the Lord Build the House …’”

Love of friends

“I even have been blessed throughout my life with Christlike friends — from friends of my youth to the various individuals who have blessed our family in all of the wards we’ve got lived in. Their faith and commitment to the gospel of Jesus Christ, their service, their sensible and mild instruction have enriched our lives. Some of my friends are very different from me. We disagree about things, and we will even irritate one another. But friendship allows for differences — in reality, it embraces them.”

— Sister Kathleen H. Hughes, then the primary counselor within the Relief Society general presidency, April 2005 general conference, “What Greater Goodness Can We Know: Christlike Friends”

“I believe in all of us there may be a profound eager for friendship, a deep craving for the satisfaction and security that close and lasting relationships may give. Perhaps one reason the scriptures make little specific mention of the principle of friendship is since it needs to be manifest quite naturally as we live the gospel. In fact, if the consummate Christian attribute of charity has a primary cousin, it’s friendship. To paraphrase the Apostle Paul barely, friendship ‘suffereth long, and is kind; [friendship] envieth not; … seeketh not her own, just isn’t easily provoked, thinketh no evil; … [friendship] never faileth’ (1 Corinthians 13:4-8).”

— Elder Marlin K. Jensen, April 1999 general conference, “Friendship: A Gospel Principle”

“It takes courage to be an actual friend. Some of us endanger the valued classification of friend due to our unwillingness to be one under all circumstances. Fear can deprive us of friendship. Some of us discover our closest friends as those with the courage to stay and share themselves with us under all circumstances. A friend is a one who will suggest and render the very best for us whatever the immediate consequences. …

“A friend within the true sense just isn’t a one who passively nods approval. A friend is a one who cares.”

— Elder Marvin J. Ashton, October 1972 general conference, “What Is a Friend?”

Love of self

“Our Heavenly Father wants us to like ourselves — to not turn out to be prideful or self-centered, but to see ourselves as He sees us: we’re His cherished children. When this truth sinks deep into our hearts, our love for God grows. When we view ourselves with sincere respect, our hearts are open to treat others that way too. The more we recognize our divine price, the higher we understand this divine truth: that God has sent us right here, without delay, at this momentous time in history, in order that we will do the best possible good with the abilities and gifts we’ve got. This is our time!”

— Elder S. Gifford Nielsen, April 2021 general conference, “This Is Our Time!”

“Please, my beloved brothers and sisters, we must stop comparing ourselves to others. We torture ourselves needlessly by competing and comparing. We falsely judge our self-worth by the things we do or don’t have and by the opinions of others. If we must compare, allow us to compare how we were up to now to how we’re today — and even to how we would like to be in the long run. The only opinion of us that matters is what our Heavenly Father thinks of us. Please sincerely ask Him what He thinks of you. He will love and proper but never discourage us; that’s Satan’s trick.”

— Elder J. Devn Cornish, October 2016 general conference, “Am I Good Enough? Will I Make It?”

“Being a [child] of God implies that should you seek it, yow will discover your true identity. You will know who you might be. This will make you free — not free from restraints, but free from doubts, anxieties or peer pressure. You won’t have to worry, ‘Do I look all right?’ ‘Do I sound OK?’ ‘What do people consider me?’ A conviction that you simply are a [child] of God gives you a sense of comfort in your self-worth. It means that you may find strength within the balm of Christ. It will make it easier to meet the heartaches and challenges with faith and serenity.”

— President James E. Faust, October 1999 general conference, “What It Means to Be a Daughter of God”